Thursday, June 19, 2014

28 days.

rehabilitation. the act of restoring something to it's original state. my time at home cures some sort of city sickness that i wasn't quite sure what was even ill...
she seems like a different side of things from this point of view, so calmly relaxing and i think "it is worth living this brightly colored light".

to say i had dreamed it all would be too cliche but rather relevant to the actual situation. it consisted of many days and nights that i had already seen and most likely will see again. each day "i would imagine" was able to be filled with moments of heaven on earth.

in a new thought of heaven being covered on earth if you so choose, your mind is one of the most powerful tools in our current existence. getting the courage, focus and concentration is the secret to creating all of your time alive. he argues this point and tries to put a moral code on my theory... by the light of fire reflected off his face he called me psycho and unsympathetic... but rather he put a few words in my mouth that i hadn't intended in my own thoughts, his own personal spin. maybe i should've elaborated more or mentioned the phenomenon of jesus rising from the dead, but yes, i do believe that you can come back to earth after death, "if you deserve to be here".

i do not favor the word "deserve" in this description of life. i look at it as a whole unit, so one person's life reflects amongst the others... it's just their humanly outer surface is used for display... by example, each human being used in a way to show or teach another how powerful God really is. better to be explained with your own worldly thoughts and etchings... mine in particular is quite the "lunatic" side show.

shaking hands we agree on something... i can't quite remember the exact thread that sparked a hand shake... but he felt the need to seal in a mutual bond. i look into his eyes as if i am staring in awe of outer space... and all it's collections of galaxies... black space... moons and stars. if i could answer all the mysteries of our universe i would, except i'm too busy falling in love with this boy, silly boys.  we aren't really looking for answers anyhow, if we knew the solution, well, wouldn't you just want to die?!

the very last drop of time i spent wrapped in loving arms... ones that spread far and wide, even transcending through the realm of our youthful situation. for better or worse, we can't leave each other alone for much longer, i use all of my strength to just rest my head along the shoulders of a familiar spot, sensing the night's progression of flavors...

funny how just a few hours before i was walking along the atlantic, after just arriving from the mountains... wondering how on earth life was going to place such a surprise; one that gets my blood flowing again, gives me hope of how if you let loose of control... you gain the very reigns you had been fighting all along. waking up in a whirlwind of emotion... visions of him in an orange shirt, on the back of a pickup truck, me in his lap happily kissing him along his neck and cheeks, i giggle as if i were a child... all the things i have loved and will love were shown to me in a vision, one that took place during this recovery. amen.

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