as an artist we must continually court the idea of this newness so we can create. i get it. i am doing a rather similar dance and it has caused me to fall quite in a tipsy fashion of love. the amount of love you give... is the amount you get... right?
but i feel him far away and late last night i felt as if a flame may have been dimmed as i fell asleep alone. the universe might just be playing a few tricks on me to ease the leaving of the left coast, but i have only hours left and if i don't get to hold his most beautiful, handsome face... i might actually forget what he looks like before i return. it hurts. guess that is the game we play.
what i would give right now to see it all, but i must have the ability to settle with my immediate surroundings. placing several cards down to take a chance on my own vulnerability.. i believe i'll take the train to LA to get some reading done and maybe stumble into the shadow of a lover that i once had.
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