"i like your eye color.."
"what color do you see?"
"like a hazel..."
"amber?"
"more like gold, they said jesus had golden eyes."
in the midst of the evening a turn of circumstances brought in the coldest of air. chilled to the bone i wasn't able to shake off the stale feeling... all i wanted was a hot bath. so far from home... only a familiar skeleton of what i used to care for. after the first song, after waiting ALLLLLL that time to see this band.... i walked out. i had heard it before, i didn't feel like saying any words. yes, hearing that i am "beautiful" throughout the day is a blessing, i suppose. i am thankful for these words, but in my dark phase i'd rather have something else to say. the hashing of repeated phrases and thoughts. i did speak with the girl whose hair glows of gold and she said what i could've said to myself. "paying for an apartment that i'm not living in ... in a city, well i'm not ready to leave here yet, the city will be there" but the phase "it's not really going anywhere" (here) is the key to what i collected. she is intriguingly beautiful, i guess i should have said that out loud.
my slight desire to get the vinyl signed almost kept me around, but after spotting a creative balance of trying to be everywhere and no where at once... i decided that i would just leave without it. i am a fan, always will be... but the sound is a bit too loud for my liking at this moment. time to exit scene.
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