Tuesday, November 25, 2014

the end.

for one feeling to seize to allow another to arise. this flame keeps putting me out just to light me again... but this time i had to seize fire. leaving it only to fate that we should even see each other. to stop all the tears... i am a fool for ever crying them! and then to tell the one that i love... oh the sensation of tears while biking in the city, only to feel the cool breeze sizzling the saline on  your   skin.

cover me in the skin that once was.

"i am almost there".

....too late, you are gone.

Monday, November 24, 2014

booze & fags.

business as usual sitting in the park with all of our "tools".
tall green cans and musical instruments fill the evening
electric pastel pink... once again fills the minds eye sunset
on this oceanside city. a small sliver of moon is visible to
only those that look into the night's set. exiting scene
shortly after the sun... to embark on her own world tour.
the dusk turns damp and chill... with only seven minutes
to spare we glance lips briefly in the darkness and part
ways.



left with only silence and the chaos of my emotions
to lay down on the floor after standing on my crown
for a moment to meditate. hours later i awake to the 
curiosity of time... which i have passed and missed 
an important engagement, i suppose that is what i do 
best.

Saturday, November 22, 2014

no + one

solitude. as if we are on a separate plane and only in small instances can we even see the physical creature that is my desire. planetary alignment is shifting and if gravity has any relevance... tension is sensationalized be it of my vivid imagination. we don't see eye to eye and i literally said "maybe i should just give it all up and say "fuck it"" i said that.

did i mean that?
sure.

breathe in honey, you are in for a ride.
looking at things from a different angle.
now he has all these "time" restrictions.
i remember when all we used to have
was time.

indeed i left it to fate to make it for me,
but i don't connect on this level. just to be
"out" is a pressure that alone can not even
cease.

calling out for comfort... no answer.
better that way. it is going to take
some time to accumulate material
and the essence of a talent. magical
talent is the brilliance of representation
and such projects that better the world.

to share it would be nice. in all honesty
i should've tried harder, looked more.
but the feelings are not there. their. they're. 

Friday, November 21, 2014

if not now, then never.

beach house says it herself... themselves. i feel alone today. i feel disconnected and less than full of life... is a cycle. life death. beginning end. one zero. i feel the ending of sorts... electric pastel pink is what is in my mind. cluster f*cked with society and the culture that surrounds the city.

who am i to say...
"smile, darling... it is your day to be magical."
i am. each and everyday. washing the self-conscious body rid of her insecurity. he will not leave you.. this i know, because the...

blind
interior
binding
lives
eternal

told me so.

Thursday, November 20, 2014

sound of silence.

Em   D   Em    C   G  Em    C   G   C    C/G   G   Em  D    Em   Em   D   Em   Em   C  G   Em   C  G   C      G    Em     D    Em      Em  D   Em   Em   C   G  Em   C   G  C  G  Em    D    Em   Em  D  Em  Em    G...

nevermind, it's the A & F chord.

this time is where the stillness creates tension. it's beginning to show in my skin and i'm having a hard time catching my breath. "this beauty is so good, what happens if i just turn around and walk away?"

try it. i can't. please don't blow out my...

and so the days progress and i am soon to have a relevance and a lifestyle that is more flexible. imagining the future as if it has already been and will be. taking hope in brighter days and subtle hints of recognition. what is the sound of passion? what is the price? as if teetering is a detachment and all i can do is call attention to how far i have come! this! this "time" was that of a journey to see where i have come... who have i created here?! to let you know that truth... i am the fire and you can not take what is rightfully mine to have, in time.

building something.
quality is a transaction that will take place
without the use of currency. webs. spinning webs.

Sunday, November 16, 2014

zealous.

"what is it that you need from me?"

interconnected in a ever changing challenging loop that consist of what is... in front of you. irony is a brilliant shadow and the lines have been clear. all along in small poetic notions, desperate to cross eventually. who is to ask us why, how come, and are yyou sure. challenge is a blessing and i will soon inherit my fare.

Thursday, November 13, 2014

skin & bones.

"sweetie"...

he addresses me in such a manner that i am sure we have been here before.
what could explain "this".
so we paint. and dream. and each fiber begins to bind it's self with another.
circles. circles. circles.
don't touch. dropping to my knees i cry out. these expressions shift shape my thought. the unexpected.

i am frightened to go outside at times because of a fear of what could actually happen. relevance. in a magical twist of fate. love without sex. for i am in love with the one that connects me & holds me in the vanity of my own selfish needs!! so i want to let out a cry that says to you, trust in the God that created you and you shall rise above the insanity of what is "daily life"...

"is this it?" no. it is indeed not "it" at all and i see that wonder is a marvelous tool and i prepare to escape this blunder of a place.



inspired by sobriety. yes my Lord. i am her.





Saturday, November 8, 2014

expired.

i feel that my time is running thin & if my body, mind & spirit follow suit then i have certainly reached the edge of exemption. inception reassures this theory... but currency flow has ceased and before long i'll have to come up with an alternative structure of affordance. standing on a ledge that is too surreal and now, even, comfortable at this height, shall i create my own intervention? or am i just to jump off and see where i land? back east? a couch... the street? i haven't a clue at this point. the cells that once had imagination.. vision and clearness are now congested with dead cells. i look forward to shedding this old skin...set an appointment with a specialist first thing monday morning.
                                                                                        until then... i'll listen to the fire suite.