Sunday brunch.

I lessen the need to escape home some days. The setup was amazing, a buffet style of fruit and chocolate delight. The setting is on the bay, a spring like breeze flows about... I am reflecting on the surrounding. Nothing like this at home...

I am at a lose for words... The days are running into each other. I am a blessed soul.. Saturday sushi nights with Ali and Sunday brunch with the salon staff... Good food, good music... Really, what more could I want? I want so much more.

Is it selfish to say that I am indeed meant for fame. I want to be known around the world... Not in the famous way that people stumble around about you... But in a 'fashionable' way. Where everyone caters to me, but no one really knows...

I need protection, security, a few body guards. A driver and an assistant. This is my next goal... To be successful in a way that I need the help of others to help me help others. That's what I want next. 

Sugar.

The chemicals are equivalent to that of pleasure. The surge of happiness that fills your insides and graces you with more energy. Move drive, more power. I tasted syrup today. The sharp edges of crystallized honey seeping off the pacific coastline. The sunset was that of a mirage, thick teal gray clusters that blended into the horizon, creating a glass like image. The power of the waves crashing, smoothed rocks and tangled your hair.  Cloud cover played cotton candy colors along the shore. That sight was memorable, possibly forever. If you think back a year it will give you a clue. I was childishly dreaming  of where I am today.  With an exception of course... I took a path that was yet uncovered and I couldn't imagine a thing. Now I am laying here in an west coast oceanside  mountain cabin... Last year I was in an east side oceanfront house with what I imagined as my future husband. The good thing about life is ... You don't always get what you wish for.

12.16.12

empty glass full.

Now is the time to stop and listen. What is that sound?  Live music always brings me back to life. Especially when it is meant for my ears only.  I want to slow down and breathe in the essence of what is happening.  Unfortunately I just keep going ... Faster.

The sights to see.  A familiar taste, the left coast. Seeing the surfers and ocean  motion reminded me that it will be alright. A few new sights and some positive ions; does  wonders with the soul. A new side of life, time to flip the cassette. 

Conversations with silence. Then thoughts to music.  A jazzy string quartet was the entertainment, a cup of jasmine tea.  Sounds marvelous. It is refreshing to see civilized humans admiring talent.  The uniqueness of the band was lovely, the company was smart.  I'm into genius currently, flattered with lost souls earlier, now I'm interested in the discovery of brilliance.  It's going to take a team of people, not just one, to build walls of wisdom with me. Several great minds, each one bringing a notion to the table.  Change is going to be the answer. 

"Once you set your mind to something, the body is soon to follow."-Matthew Stewart 

He sang songs of love and following your desire. There is something calming about the repetitive trance his style placed me in.  The strings danced around and gave me visions of the salsa number with him.  The contact of our eyes and skin, leaking out bits of saline and hidden emotion... The passion.  I lust after it for the time being.  Body language speaks volumes.

Discovery. Rest and music.  Rinse and repeat.  Feelings of empty.. Give it back to me, let me feel again.  The song by ray lamontange says it best.. "I've been to hell and back so many times you kinda bore me."  This speaks for me now, the fact I was able to hear it live.. Acoustic .. A blessing in disguise. I've been revived, the sound waves and ocean salt felt like home.