Sugar.

The chemicals are equivalent to that of pleasure. The surge of happiness that fills your insides and graces you with more energy. Move drive, more power. I tasted syrup today. The sharp edges of crystallized honey seeping off the pacific coastline. The sunset was that of a mirage, thick teal gray clusters that blended into the horizon, creating a glass like image. The power of the waves crashing, smoothed rocks and tangled your hair.  Cloud cover played cotton candy colors along the shore. That sight was memorable, possibly forever. If you think back a year it will give you a clue. I was childishly dreaming  of where I am today.  With an exception of course... I took a path that was yet uncovered and I couldn't imagine a thing. Now I am laying here in an west coast oceanside  mountain cabin... Last year I was in an east side oceanfront house with what I imagined as my future husband. The good thing about life is ... You don't always get what you wish for.

12.16.12

Welcome to California

Three thousand miles ago... We are across the country. Far away from our past. Onward to who I strive to become.

The time will come when I can leave at any moment. Jet setting and fashion shows. A few classes and maybe even a hair salon.  Those are just to name a few.. Maybe a yacht and an island home. All this takes time and patience, perseverance and timing. Timing is everything.  I'm ready to cross the line and make something happen. 

Everything is different. But I feel a sense of calm now that we are finally here. I experienced some tension along the way, I now have a second to breathe.  Just one breath. The cars move along now quickly and consecutively... Symbolizing how quickly life passes by and the thing you always dreamed of is done and over. The cross country trip I dreamed of... Is done.  What a beautiful experience. I may have slept through a bit of it... But I've always slept at inopportune times. 

Sunset sinner.

The end of a chapter. Today made me realize that those times are past . Seeing the mountains and canyons ... Heavenly.  I imagine that heaven was a bit like today. The firery colors that changed forever, burning away the horizon. Setting fire to the static life that I had become trapped in. Now I get to see the la lights... Awake now the gold coast and all that shimmer and shines. 

The naked poem series.  Poetry in the morning... Start the day with addictions. Each one with a story to tell, covered in the running paint of controlled chaos.  the raw pencil lines leave room for detail and mistake. The clear coat to protect the ever changing lines.  

San Francisco... Gentle people with flowers in their hair. The history of the trip... The explanation of movement.  Only eight-hundred miles until the other end of our adventure.  The beginning of my artistic journey.  I have dreamed so much the last couple of weeks, the imagination creates all sorts of stories without a plan. Fill in the blanks for awhile. So I am hitting the highway... What a scene. 

Simmered yellow and gold threads

Laced about a cotton

Field of soaked merlot

And cinnamon spills.

The blaze of flames covers

Forever of sand and fault

Lines of fence and 

Barren lands.

Heavenly painter of the skies

Designed this one for us.

The crystal gate slides 

To the side for a quick

Desperate  glimpse.

Taste of molasses 

Taints the other naive souls

Roaming through 

But forever missing

Their purpose.

In the crease of great

And glorious seconds

With only one minute to spare

to glance at this fire

That saves us. 

the i love you story.

the day of birth twenty five years ago.  on this day i ate brunch with brilliance... nothing like the refreshing cucumber.
      he kissed the top of my head.. fresh water.  a breath of fresh air.  the running water... the brass monkey in the wild.  it's a simple concept really.  the reality of love is here... the empire.  i guess it's what these days are about.  "soul searching".  the unexpected is the theme.  the positive help is the support.  when i say i love you.. i mean it.  everyone deserves that love. we need it.  it's something that will allow us to discover a new self.  a new place where we will solve the problems of the world.  for now..... the ninja turtles rule.

“The contour of the body is extremely subtle, difficult to describe accurately, and quite fascinatingly beautiful. When the contour is sensitively handled, it can stand alone, like a violin solo.”

peaceful warrior.

white lies - to lose my life

He said to lose my life or lose my love

That's the nightmare I've been running from

So let me hold you in my arms a while

I was always careless as a child

And there's a part of me that still believes

My soul will soar above the trees

But a desperate fear flows through my blood

That our dead loves buried beneath the mud

Let's grow old together

And die at the same time

she said he would die alone, i highly doubt that. just that morning he said he wished that people would leave him alone... even for just one day.

i know the feeling. when you are loved, people take everything they can from you. there is less light now than ever before.  those without will quickly steal all that is left.

we are surrounded by zombies now.  people that stand for nothing... do nothing... mean nothing.  there are ugly and gross souls all around us... sucking the joy from the hearts of those few beauties that are left.

today i found poems and stories i wrote as a child. all of my poems were sad.  they spoke of loss of love, the road to gloom and the fear of  being alone.  i love being alone, almost as much as i hate being social.  the quiet lets me be creative and produce artwork.  i need it to just be.

the sound of music excites me.  i need it everyday to survive. i need it so much that i can easily say i would die without it.  "what if there was no music?".  then i would invent it. 

"music is the next best thing to making love.  it's like a socially acceptable form of porn"-trb 

i am ready now.  i am ready to be one with my voice, my thoughts and my soul.  i have the vision, now i must create that life.  why do i keep seeing you there with me?  why are you in my dreams?  am i in yours? do i grace your thoughts... please whisper yes.

so how do we save this place?  we haven't much time.  our future relies on a hero.  several heroes.  humans that open the eyes of the majority of society... if i could be a ninja... the task would me much simpler.  but the heroes of today are in disguise.  else they would be quickly destroyed.  the government doesn't want these "heroes" to succeed.  so we prowl around the world quietly... hiding our true identity. 

Real Life Superheroes is a grassroots movement of people who create a superhero identity and work in a fun, exciting, and inspirational fashion to make the world a better place. They are using the iconic essence of comic book superheroes to make a difference, inspire others, spread a positive message, and call attention to issues in their communities.