Do you believe in magic?

In a young girls heart 

It can free her

Whenever it starts

I'll tell you about the magic

It'll free your soul

But it's like trying to tell a stranger 'bout rock and roll.

-the lovin' spoonful

Where to begin? The red and black streaks remind me that hell is sometimes upon us.. At other times you can glimpse at heaven.  When you jump back and forth is when you begin to notice the difference. You begin to see the bright and appreciate the security and comfort of the familiar. 

I'm beginning to notice that money isn't the meaning. When money  is the meaning it makes life pointless. When life is pointless you become hopeless. Once hopeless you can't find happiness... Then you create a negative space.

Where should I look now? I have several options. I should keep the doors open but I don't have any interest in other doors right now. Only a few of the already 'cracked' ones draw my attention.  I'll just look around. I need to stay focused on the moment. But I never will. My head hurts. I'm exhausted now and can't look anymore. I need silence to rest my eyes.